..all mixed up..

2011-01-06T00:15:00.006+08:00

listenning to Lifehouse tonight,
and I wish I could sing you the "Everything" song,
would you tell me how?

2010-11-16T00:17:00.001+08:00

temporary bliss.

where do i find perpetual happiness?

10/10/10

2010-10-12T00:30:00.004+08:00

is there any room for allowance?
could you accept a deviation from the standard?
would you mitigate the costs of a mistake?

because afterall, she lets u get away with every pain that she suffers
and yet, still feels sorry all the time
when will the voice tell her 'its ok, dont worry, everything is gonna be alright" ?

We are the same afterall.

2010-10-05T02:37:00.003+08:00

So today, i looked forward to seeing him cos i've missed him for the past 7 days.

Everything was great until i asked "So long distance relationships will never work?"
And he replied "NO, look at melanie"

My heart dropped, and my fear was right..I am just like Melanie to him.
That's it -- nothing more.
We probably end up the same fate, in love with a guy who will never love us back the same.

I know nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity..but yet i keep running back to the person who keeps reminding me how foolish I can be for him.

hurt

2008-11-11T23:36:00.004+08:00

Being caught up in emotions over people who doesnt care for you as much as you do for them is stupid.

and i cant help feeling stupid.

i failed my aiesec interview

2008-04-14T03:55:00.002+08:00

failure -- it felt like suffering a miscarriage.

i was at first surprised about the sudden interview and didnt want to go for it..
like how u feel shocked when u suddenly realise ur pregnant and doubtful about the baby

then after some thoughts and encouragement, i decided to go for the interview..
like how u finally accept the fact that ur pregnant and start to feel excited about the baby

during preparation of the interview, i was so excited bout the options..taiwan?? switzerland?? australia?? belgium??
like how u start thinking bout the little clothes and little mittens and bedroom deco for the little one

going through the interview..
it felt like going for checkups at the hospitals

then failing the interview..
it felt like a miscarriage seriously. the baby is gone. my head went blank and only at that moment i realised how much i really wanted this opportunity but its gone

it only gets worse when my mom scolded me for failing the interview..
like how i always watch on dramas, how the parents and parents-in-law and the husband get angry and blamed the woman for losing her baby when she herself is already going through hell

*
hahaha, u probably think that im being too dramatic here. but it really felt like that, losing something that really matters to me. sigh, oh well, i should stop myself from all the 'if only's and stop whining bout this anymore.

back to the jobhunt.

if we could, we would hv broken up a long time ago

2008-04-11T14:51:00.003+08:00

i really donno how long more we can continue living in the same house like this?

what what bothers me more, is why do we always end up like this?
why is it getting worse each time?

u heard me saying how much i missed my mom when i was away in spore..and i couldnt help feeling upset when my mom said she feels indifferent.

the first 2 days when i was back home, it was GREAT!

we hugged, we talked like its never gonna end, we laughed so hard, we agreed on many things..

but happiness expired in 2 days and hell follows.

i know she loves me alot. in fact she gives me so much that i think other mothers dont, or wont. she counts every penny she spends but always quick to spend tens of thousands on my education..and some more to make me look pretty with braces and contact lens, stuff me with cash to send me off to interview in another country, bought me a car n paid for all maintenence fees..took care of all the housework and allowed me to do nothing at all. i dont think i can ever be as selfless as her because she basically trades off her own happiness for my future.

i love her alot too. u should know im quite a cheapskate most of the time. yet i would buy her things that cost me more than a whole month's allowance she gives me (when she still gave me). i always dream of earning alot of money when i start working and i secretly define being successful means to be able to give my parents everything they want. she didnt understand why i cant make up my mind on working overseas when everyone says its good opportunity but she didnt know the main thing is that im scared i will leave her more alone here.

yes, but it is back to war again between us.

i hate how every morning im waken up with naggings telling me to apply for jobs

i hate how every nite before i go to sleep i am being yelled at to do so at an ungodly hour

i hate how she thinks that my friends are unimportant and pretty much disposable

i hate how she thinks im so stupid i dono how to deal with many things

i hate how she tries to dictate everything including at what angle i cross my legs

she hates how i lose my patience whenever she asks me something

she hates how i raise my voice when i talk to her

she hates how i always sleep at 4am

she hates how i always spend alot of time with my friends

she hates how i dont do things her way

we both know that we have a really serious communication problem

but it wouldnt be communication if she keeps nagging one-way and i remain silent

and it wouldnt be communication if we start disagreeing on one small thing and conversation spiral downs from there onwards

it is not communication when we keep getting angry at each other

its really getting very unbearable

i spend all my time out of the house because i wanna avoid to quarrel

going home becomes a dreadful task

i dont wanna sob quietly in the bathroom or to cry myself to sleep again.

extremely bodoh

2008-03-17T17:15:00.013+08:00

so the sister is now back in school and finally nobody is hogging the computer from day till night, i have no more excuses for delaying my job applications.

i settled in front of the computer with the huge Recruit classified, with my coffee.

so the advertisement for job#1 said 'for job details and to apply, please visit our website'

and the website is not found.! what the heck?!

sigh, nevermind, i moved on to job#2

the best part is they actually have an online application section on the website!! wheeeeee!! =D cos that means i dont have to spend hours crafting a cover letter.

after filling in all the details required, this appeared..

WHAT?!! NOOOOOOOO

so i refreshed the page and tried again.

and again.

the same error kept appearing.

i was feeling abit dejected then i thought, 'eh, what about me writing in to the company with a proper cover letter and attach my resume. then i could apply right away and perhaps the HR would be impressed with my expressed interest!!'

huhu, i am such a genius right! i then spent the next few hours typing away, finally coming up with a cover letter so now i can email the company

i signed into my gmail and the checked the latest mail in the inbox which says..

"Thank you very much for your application and interest in Danone Malaysia! We will review your resume and will contact you shortly should you beshortlisted for the next round of interview. Thanks again for your interest in Danone!"

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT THE HELL????????!!!!!! are you kidding me?? the supposedly faulty application was actually sent through. -____-"

you tell me how to be enthusiastic in looking for a job.

impian terindah

2008-03-03T03:19:00.002+08:00

was looking through sunburstkl website and surprise surprise, najwa from our high school is among the list of performers!! wowwww. not bad she's a singer + songwriter..hehe this is one of her songs - impian terindah

Berjaga dari mimpiku
Bayanganmu seakan di sisiku
Mungkinkah ku masih dalam khayalan
Bisakah jadi kenyataan

Tahukah kau aku di sini
Menyimpan segala rasa di hati
Mungkinkah kau akan mengerti
Andai ku luahkan semuanya

Kau impian terindah
Ingin ku jadikan ia ternyata
Dan kau ilhamkan cinta di dalam hatiku
Hanyalah dirimu

hello

2008-02-28T14:41:00.001+08:00

hola! its the end of february already in a blink of eye.!! never too late to do a recap of year 2007 rite? hahaha

i wouldnt say that last year was the most fantastic year of my life but there were definately moments that i will never forget..

like the trip to Bali with mel, cy, lifu and chien. the amazing race with our trusty avanza, the scary beaches, the bakso, the torn contact lens, the monkey attack, the beautiful uluwatu, the stupid babi guling, the gay bar, the drinking games, the massage, and lifu's addiction with my strawberry lotion hahaha

i got more involved in LEO and took up the post as Community Service Director..learnt so much from working with a wonderful BOD and the helpful members. the organising and visit to Rumah Ozanam, PAWS, blood donation, bfast campaign..

got to know the most obnoxious person on earth whom i argued with every single day without fail. the person who nearly moved me but made me a more cynical person in the end.

had an exam paper defferred. and thank god i passed it in the end. that was also the first time i stayed in a VIP hospital ward (got pantry and all but not like i used it)on my own in Seremban. and the blood test results which manage to keep me away from fatty foods, but only for one week.

stand in for few Pantene TVC shooting and was amazed by how meticulous the whole shotting can be. respect. the best part was getting to know my pantene gang (cristine, poh yi, eva and the gang). and got conned into becoming the bad hair model, damn!! haha but u wont see me cos its a vietnamese ad =P

got the most severe sunburn and weirdest tanline.

got closer to ppl like fatty ho, ingrid, hannah...which now i look back and cant imagine 2007 without them.

attended monash ball.

became a kiasu with 2whole months of studying, mainly with joezer and ge whom i see almost everyday after i wake up and before i go to sleep. the serious times, the kan cheong times but mostly the fun times into 7ams in the mornings. u cant imagine how much i miss them now.

graduated. hehe =)

trip to langkawi with joez n ge. the most terrible train ride, the depressing rainy days, the amount of time we spend sleeping, malibu and baileys, teman tapi mesra (stupid inside joke), the chocolate flavoured ciggie, the raggae bar

went to Starbucks so many times i dont dare to calculate how much i spent on hot chocolate. Coffee Bean i still love you.!!

had several rounds of dinner to celebrate my 21st. with the college mates, the darlings, one on one with ge (hehh), my family, and even the pantene gang. unexpectedly i got a clown cake (cry), over 400 ppl sang me the birthday song during the Aiesec NLDS conference, and the oh-so-cute birthday cupcakes.

spent alot of time with see mun this year. hahah. its a good thing im not complaining dear..!!

though im still pretty kiam siap, i've been spending alot more money on shopping aiks

(hahaha! obviously this is not one of my purchases lar duh!)

singapore trip with the family. which unexpectedly turned into a trip with the extended family. hahaha. makan makan and more makan. the pink dolphins!! the unproductive shopping, but yeah great time spent with the family

fell in love with mike he jun xiang and became 16 all over again. hahahha

and the year ended with me standing under and staring up at the same fireworks-lit sky. may we're all lookin at a greater future in front of us..mwahhhs <33

a different kinda emotion

2008-01-31T03:25:00.000+08:00

hmm i doubt ppl still bother to check for updates with my blog. haha. suddenly got the mood to blog all over again because..cheng cheng cheng..i feel emo la..what else?

i was working yesterday at the KL Convention Centre yesterday. no, i have yet to apply for any proper jobs, it was simply a one-day thing. haha dont start nagging. anyways the point is, the job ends at 10pm and my heels almost killed me. i was like hoping to get a ride home after a long and hungry day but of course it is time like this where i dono who to turn to. i watched my colleages being picked up while i had to walked through the tunnel and to the lrt station in those damned heels. the 40min train ride took me to the lrt station nearest to home. i checked my phone for the one last time and i gave up and walked home. the journey home wasnt too far but the thoughts of the pervert i met when i was walking back from tuition years ago kept playing in my head. i was scared alright, i cant remember the last time i walked home at 11.30pm.

and i was feeling so alone and sad at home. then my phone rang. it was my mom asking me if i finish work. asking me if she should go pick me up from the train station. asking me if i had dinner.

i lied to her that i've had dinner tho all i had was like 3 lousy pieces of finger food but i forced my parents to come home n pick me up for supper. i happily gobbled down a roti at the mamak and felt so thankful for having my parents. moments like these are rare but it made me realise that sometimes the only people i can depend on are only my parents.

If I Ain't Got You

2007-12-19T02:29:00.000+08:00

Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what's within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, Yeah

Some people search for a fountain
That promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share
With no one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, you, you
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, yeah

If I ain't got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby

to all my dearest-s:

it doesnt matter how long have i known you,
or how often do i see you,
i believe for fate to bring you into my life,
and for me to decide that you ought to stay,
i cannot imagine if i aint got you.
i might not say this often enough..
but thank you for being a big part of my life,
and please dont ever leave me,
because i need you,
because you complete me.

<3>

2007-12-18T01:20:00.000+08:00

been neglecting my blog i know.. =P

i cant the damned camera cable!! hence, cant transfer all the pics into my comp..! gah why is it always like that for me.??

seriously i dont wanna put the blame on anything else but GARGHHH

this time around

2007-12-05T02:23:00.000+08:00

its gonna be different
its gotta be the most unexpected way of spending my birthday
and it just has to be my 21st birthday
just great.

growing up sucks!! sobs*

zero

2007-11-10T13:50:00.000+08:00

greetings people!!

i know i've been detached from the outside world for the past whole month =P everyday i wake up to books, notes, ge hui, joezer and cafeine injections. haha thank god for the two darlings, so our study sessions were always fun and random ehehe!

these few days i've been waking up to nothing. its funny now that i have to think and think how to fill up my time. but yeah, i think im finally graduating.!

i think u must be sick of me saying how much i dont wanna graduate by now, but yeah i really really dont want to, just yet. sigh. the future is such a blur and im just too afraid of the outside world. T__T

where do i go from now??

M.I.A

2007-10-21T00:33:00.000+08:00

i've been camping in the library..
and will continue to do so for the coming weeks.
T______T

i cant wait for the 7th!! =)

black nail polish

2007-10-08T00:15:00.000+08:00

is so difficult to put on.!! gahh!!

anyways nothin much happenned last week cos we were sooooooooooo taken up with the marketin plannin and implementation assignment..which was by the way, my very last assignment in uni. T____T having kiasu group mates really make me feel guilty for being so lazy. haha

oh yeah last week i promised myself to NOT log into facebook cos i spend at least like an hour everytime i log in...grrr and so i did it!!! mwahahahha so proud of myself.!! and surprisingly i didnt suffer much of the facebook withdrawal symptoms..but i spent hours replying and super-poking people yesterday, just in case my frens think im too damn lansi now. hahah i was watching this video and how they made 'poking' sound like such an intimate thing. wtf. hahaha i must admit facebook can be quite fun but being obsessed with it is not cool.

wednesday is go green campaign.!! i think i need to shop for a green top!! hahaha.

ugh got updates for my break but the photos are in my phone.!! and i dont hv bluetooth connection on my comp!! so annoying.

speaking of which, yesterday i wanted to watch 'one litre of tears' that han burned for me (thanks han =)) . it was in DVD format therefore i cant watch on my comp cos i only have VCD rom. my laptop has DVD rom BUT the sound device is not working and somebody told me to try pluggin in headphones. and apparently the sound device really kaput edi and it wont even play the file.! gahhh! so finally today i watched it in the living room and just after episode 8 my grandad came home so i let him watch whatever tv programme he wanted. blehh i cant wait for episode9!!

something productive

2007-09-30T02:36:00.000+08:00

i've been wanting to do something to my blog layout since forever and finally i got my lazy ass moving and mana tau all this creative juice (over)flow and i designed quite a few banners. haha in the end had to spend damn long a time comtemplating back and forth and settled with this one. =)

*proud*

nice or not?? =P

p/s: look backwords from time to time ya, hehe im gonna slowly updaate on my short break.

fergie's lullaby

2007-09-26T01:49:00.000+08:00

today was supposed-to-go-for-manicure-but-failed day with ingy ingrid! nevermind, its still all good teehee =)

first stop was lunch at One Noodle, SS2

i fell in love with the CHILLI.!!
omg damn nice (but its soaked in oil bleh) i think i kinda finished the whole bottle of it. haha

stuffed ourselves silly then moved on to our second home, 1Utama

can

you

guess

where were these pictures taken?? hehe

i've been craving for this since last sunday's afternoon tea at delicious @ bangsar village II

chocolate sauce + ice cream + strawberries + almond flakes = a glimpse of heaven
mmmmmmmmmm T______T

me n ingA, haha happy dear?

look at these c o l o u r s !! makes me so happy
thats why i have a weird habit of buying coloured paper for no reasons

basically, we went paper shopping today! hahahah
that woman la, pull me back into my scrapbooking mood (dont laugh)

=) at one time i was so crazy bout scrapbooking, i went shoppin for paper, i went online and read scrapbooking forums, i downloaded templates and designs for 'inspiration', BUT in the end didnt really start any project (-_-) i know i know, my enthusiasm can only last that long

lets see if i have time to get anything started this time >.<

monash ball 2007

2007-09-22T02:51:00.000+08:00

i remember how when we were in high school and college, prom is like "the event" of the year and everyone's anticipating it since the beginning of the year. although i've never been one of those who shop 3 months before hand and had my hairdresser practise the perfect hair 10times before the big night, there were still that girly prom chats and excitement without a doubt.

balls just dont seem to be very hyped up in uni to me. hence this is the first, and sadly the last monash ball im attending throughout my 3 years in monash.

ironically, 2 weeks before the ball itself were the busiest two weeks i had in uni -___-" im already sleep deprived usually (therefore the permanant eyebags and dark circles and terrible skin), and thanks to the late nights, the largest pimple ever just had to surface on my nose!! why god, why?? T______T

assignments were finally completed on thursday 4pm and i was left with 5hours to shop for my dress, shoes, bag and accessories. talk bout mission impossible man!! i tried mid valley but no luck. went over to bangsar and finally found my dress after walking into every single boutique on the telawi steets!!! sadly i couldnt find a nice long dress or stick to the theme (film noir) but i was rather happy with my satin dress.

the owners were the loveliest persons ever!! T___T i tried on 2 dresses and must have spent like over 30minutes in the dressing room cos i cant decide on which one =( finally i came out of the room and told them about it, they were so kind to help me deciding, flipping through magazines to show me what to match the dresses with, told me to take my time (when they were supposed to be closed already) and as i was sitting down thinking they served me a cold packet of green tea.! and when i finally decided on the dress, they even gave me a dustbag and a hanger along with my dress! T______T *so touched* so remember to drop by at purpledotz when you're in bangsar alright!!

i was frantically calling up people asking where to get my hair and makeup done on friday itself! damn last minute wei. haha managed to squeeze some time for blood donation whee =) and because of the lack of sleep i actually felt damn dizzy after i donated. eeeks! scary. then had to rush to pyramid with ge to do our hair. the hairdressers were quite funny and kept calling me princess as they were giving me a princess-y hairdo. makeup was finally done at 6.30!! (we started at 2.30!!) oh ya i realise loos wise, i like macho, cool looking men.!! haha i was di-sot-ted by the makeup artist, kinda nakata hidetoshi-looking mwahahhaha. had to rush all the way back home to get changed and kenneth picked me up and we all had to rush down to mandarin oriental.

luckily for this thing called the malaysian timing, we were late but the ball has yet to start. haha! then it was snap snap snap all the way! and makan of course (so rushing today all i had was the red bean bun i got from blood donation hahaha)

after party was at passion/poppy. twas a fun night, never had so many uni frens out on a night before haha. after a bowl of hot and yummy sup kambing it was time to go to lala land.

i know you've been waiting for this, time to let the pictures do the talking hehehe..

introducing my 'date' -- ms ge hui =)

man kit -- new hair eh?

hannah -- who looks damn womanly!! ahahha almost cant recognise her

felicia -- pretty

me.wengz.man kit. phooi see -- taylors people

pardon the blue. aiks! dono who adjusted florescent lighting for me!

david -- aka wang li hom haha

their table had red wine.!!

hamsap-ing soo yin --revenge

groupie -- table 55 and more

ok i realise there are too many pictures haha, so i'll just upload them in facebook alright. go check my facebook soon. (note: soon)

partying with joez and ge

victor -- " you're friendlier when tipsy"

i tell you the world is damn small

best example: eva and john!! heehe

yufoong -- caretaker of the night, thanks

lin - non-monashian who came for the fun

my cute date again - she is half my size!! jealous

and finally the CLASSIC PICTURE!!!

look at mr kenneth ho wei ern!!

hahaha everytime i see this picture i laugh till my stomach hurts.!

remember..more pictures will be uploaded to facebook >.<

the essay??

2007-09-19T03:58:00.000+08:00

judging by the rate im going,
i think i'll be freaking botak before i can even finish my readings.!!
(refer to post on trichotillomania)

T________T

crown of glory

2007-09-12T22:29:00.000+08:00

yesterday, my hair was soft and nice. then somebody sprayed salt water on it, curled it with burning hot curling iron, sprayed some hairspray (the kind that makes your hair stiff and ugly), and then rubbed half a bottle of powder into my hair.

today, my hair was 'styled' with cream from a tiramisu cake.

had to wash my poor hair twice today, used three times more the shampoo and conditioner.

crown of glory??
haha, not quite.

why cant i

2007-09-10T03:21:00.000+08:00

stop pulling out my hair??
GRRR so damn annoying.

i suffer from trichotillomania, ie. the impulse control disorder with the repeated urge to pull out hair. its been happening for years and it happens whenever im under stress.

i really wonder why cant i start doing my work so i will feel less stressed, rather than keep pulling out my hair which will gimme more work (to sweep the floor).??

sobs* i dont wanna go for another hair treatment for balding scalp. so humiliating =(

la la la~

2007-09-08T15:05:00.000+08:00

yeayy..! im now back to the usual sunshine self!!

well, almost lar, now im being super stressed pulak, thanks to those goddamn assignments.!! week9 is gonna be hell =(

* * *
i guess she finally realised that she's pushing me away by treating me that way, so now we're compromising and on really good terms!! =)
hehe im so happy you have no idea

* * *
just received the pictures from kenneth..

many people asked me, "where did you spend your merdeka eve??"
i replied, "oh, i went to The Marketplace"
"eh please la, be serious"
"erm, i AM serious, i went to The Marketplace"

a pretty bungalow-converted restaurant/bar, The Marketplace is secluded from the busy party scene in KL. situated on jalan yap kwan seng, i find it a great place to chill and unwind. =)

audrey-kenneth-nikki-azlin
our wannabe tattler-fied picture! hehe

the (lousy) boys passed out.

the party ended and what the hell are we posing as again??
oh god, i looked 5 months pregnant.!! fuck.

and my big fat face for those who forgot how i look like.
whoever took this pic must really like me, zoom till so close for what?! own up kenneth/azlin.

and this is my fav picture of the lot. HAHAHA.

* * *
ooo, just got my prudential medical assistance card. so my frens, next time if anything happens to me (choi!), this card will be in my purse.

by the way, i was reading list of international services at the back of the card, travel assistance, medical services, bla bla, repatriation of mortal remains.?! *faints*

believe it..

2007-09-02T14:27:00.000+08:00

i remembered a friend once told me
most of the times he goes clubbing is when he is feeling upset cos that is where you can drown your sorrows

i used to never believed that. because the next day you will wake up with your problems not solved, plus an additional hangover.

i never believed that until today.

i woke up this morning and recalled how i went 'bottoms up!!' at this new ( i think) club bamboo,
laughin at the nerdy gay kwailo happily dancing his night away,
went to the toilet and let all my emotions out (thanks darl for being there),
sent stupid 'i miss you' smses to alot of ppl,
left to the mamak and talked at some ridiculously high decibel,
cracking stupid racist jokes with cheryl, kennedy n linnie.
things that i would never do when im sober.

i also woke up this morning realised that im all cried out, and there's nothing more that i can do.
i've tried rationalising, i've tried fighting back, i've tried keeping quiet, i've tried being invisible, i've tried avoiding, i've tried whatever i can..

so here i am, emotionally drenched.
and i know there will never be an end to this, i could only pray for it to be less painful.

i cleaned up my room just now. this time around i finally threw away all the useless receipts, cracked eyeshadows and dated coupons. (its not easy you see, im a weird sentimental person)
and so i decided im gonna do the same with my emotional baggage.

its about time i stop wallowing in this ________. ( i dono what to call it)
this will be my last emo post, i promise, at least for the time being. =)

bad news & good news

2007-08-26T20:30:00.000+08:00

i broke the coffee presser when i was washing it just now.! *smacks forehead*

great. now i cant brew my own coffee anymore.!! grrrrr =(
by the way, nickers, i donno why the coffee i brew with the coffee powder you gave me dont taste as good as it smells. haha please ask ur mom how to do it the right way, can?

parents were in the kitchen when the lil accident happened
first thing my dad asked was 'did you cut yourself?'
i smiled and said 'no'
i walked out of the kitchen, curi-curi glanced at the cut on my palm
sometimes all it takes is a little care to stop the bleeding. =)

bahhhhh

2007-08-22T01:47:00.000+08:00

she yelled at me again =(
and i kept quiet all the time.
i thought it was like just another day of us quarrelling and i'd expect that we pretend like nothing's happened on the next day, as usual

thats why i was kinda taken aback but how much it affected me this time.
i donno what is that feeling called. its not numbness definately, cos everytime she talks to me thereafter, my mind will go back to that day where she uttered all those nasty words at me. this time, i cannot just go back to normal like how i always do. part of me was angry, but a bigger part of me was hurt so badly that i just dont know how to face her anymore.

on the first day i didnt even look at her. i just cant. my ears were fighting so hard to push her voice out. on the following days it got better. we were talking again, she was like usual but i just cant. arghh. i really donno whats gotten me this time around, my head is just so stubborn i resort to using sarcasm against her. i have been sooooooooo cold to her i scared myself. trust me, i wish i could take back everything that came out of my mouth.

i havent had much time to dwell over it. or perhaps im simply running away from it. so many times i feel so tired i just feel like taking the easy way out.

last saturday was my visit to Rumah Ozanam, a shelter home for abandoned, orphaned, abused or single-parent children. by far, this home has been doing really well with a lot of sponsors. when i look at these kids, i wonder if they do wanna be reunited with their parents who abandoned them?? i wonder if they are angry at their parents?? i guess these are the things i that i'll never have the heart to bring myself to ask. but one things for sure, they reminded me of how blessed i am and how ungrateful i can be. and i feel ashamed thinking of how much these little ones must have been through behind those innocent smiles on their faces.

so many times we (or at least me) dwell on the shit that happens to us, thinking that life is goddamn unfair and we are the most pitiful persons ever. we tend to overlook these people who are going through a hell lot more compared to us. there are people fighting so hard just to live while im here plotting on how to throw my life awaay. sigh. so useless.

i shall be strong, i shall fight, and i will survive.

the one. =D

2007-08-07T00:43:00.000+08:00

Yes!! YES!! Im just so glad i found him.!! =)
and so i must declare this to the whole wide world..!! haha

I know this may appear to be quite shocking for most of you =P please don’t be mad lar ok..it was rather complicated..let me fill you in with the details ok..?? =) kekeke

This entire morning my whole head was just filled with the thoughts of him..i know my heart was telling me that I just had to see him. So yeah, I went. There he was, standing in front of my eyes, staring back at me, waiting for an answer, an answer that I’ve been struggling to come up with since last week..

Don’t wait. These two little words, often times easier said than done. How many times have you stood there, waiting, thinking, contemplating, rationalizing and repeatedly asking yourself “should I??” and before you are done with all that, the moment has passed and he has long gone. And then, all you can do is to stand there and think to yourself, “maybe I should not think so much”.

My heart was telling me “don’t wait.!” But my head just cant seem to give in so easily. “Do I really like him that much?” I questioned myself all over again. I know I like him to a certain degree but is it enough?? Am I willing to go all out and fight for him?? Am I willing to go the distance just for him??

Hehe, many of you may not know cos i dont talk about him alot. I’ve known him a few years back. It was definitely not love at first sight, haha, simply because, ermm he is not that good looking you see. But I guess as time goes by and then I finally got to know him much better personally. He is not good looking, not rich, not romantic.. (the list goes on) sadly, he just barely fulfils like 2 outta 50 of my potential boyfriend criteria haha. But he is the one guy who never fails to make me laugh. Never. He cracks me up all the time with his ultimate lameness and silly antics. =) he brings sunshine into my days. And he has such a big heart and is always so humble. Sweet. =P I have always have a secret crush on him and at one point I was all over him, I used to get up at 9am just to see him..hahaha..but the craziness died down and I still see him sometimes, just not quite often as last time. I still like him but..GAHHH.*the whole annoying thinking process repeats*

so yeah, back to the dreadful part of decision making. I walked out for some fresh air and then I sms-ed few friends and they all told me to go for it. So yeah, I guess you guys have gave me the courage and I knew I just had to say yes before I start to have second thoughts again, thank you guys.!! =) this time, I didnt the chance slip away..

and now, I have never been any happier, being able to call him mine!! =)
seriously I know I look damn stupid grinning from ear to ear but I cant help it..im just soooooooooo happy.!! Please bear with all the mushiness my darlings, hehe

I know its abit too soon, but I have never been so sure to utter those 3 magical words..

I LOVE YOU, BABY.!!

MWAHHHH!!
look how happy he is!! wakakkaka

me tryin to imitate his stupid face

a very happy me with my spongebob!!
[and i suppose a very flabbergasted you staring back at the computer screen, wakakaka]

me love you long time, spongebob.!! =D
me love you long time too, dont be mad *sayang*

summer slipped away

2007-08-05T19:33:00.000+08:00

my dear friend, u can skip this, its a whole page of rantings on uni.

uni kills.

this coming week, i've got marketing law & marketing planning tute work (3pages!) to hand in, for someone who hasnt been doing tute work for years, this is alot of work i tell you.! plus i've gotta prepare for a communications presentation on thurs
next wednesday, i'm to hand in my first communications essay and sit for my deferred case studies in international trade paper.

is it just me or is communcation subject readings so difficult to comprehend? grrrrrr..my mama should have sent me in for intensive english tuition when i was younger.!! and so much of thinking required for this subject!! oh lord, why do we have to dwell over simple issues and kill our brain cells tryin to come up with explaination for everything?!

my deferred paper..gosh im soooooo takut. to be frank, i've yet to finish reading through the entire 14 lecture topics. i know im a lousy student. argh, i just need to pass this unit please dear god.

to make matters worse, i received a warning letter from monash on last friday.

you have failed ECW3301 at least one time with blank or incomplete results.
????!!! i deferred the paper okay? so im not considered fail right? what the hell

bla bla bla..the purpose of sending this early warning letter is to inform you that your current performance is not acceptable and that Monash expects a higher standard in order for you to continue.
OMG O.O why make it sound so serious?? freaking me out weiiii =(

sigh, gotta go nerding *CRY* T.T

oh my darlings..

2007-08-01T00:56:00.000+08:00

are all getting OLDER.!! bwahahahhaha

my dearest sister turned 16 today (1st august '07)

this is the 4th year you havent been celebrating your birthday with the family.!! gosh, how time flies. remember the times when we were little where we constantly fought and hated each other.? so glad that now its all replaced with our sisterly love. wakakaka. i miss you =) happy 16th birthday, Qi..

my darling turned 21 on the 15th of july
as usual, she had multiple birthday celebrations before and after the actual day..damn greedy.

first up, we had a hefty dinner at tony romaa's (13/07/07)

the amount of food to feed (mainly) the two of us, scary no?
mwahahhaha.

food fight sommore

the yummy dessert/cake.

next stop were laundry bar & sanctuary
we had sharon, keith, and ben joining us =)

WOAH, if im not mistaken, its the first time the 3 of us partied together this year!! OMG, how time flies..i sure miss those good old times..

day 2 (14/07/07)

look how things have changed..haha nowadays its sharon fetching me around instead of me fetching her..

when we arrived, miss cheryl teh was happily singing away already

me, boon cian, sharon

the 3 of us. haha we didnt plan our outfits, we just know ;)

the girlies. stephanie. lucy. evelyn. me. cheryl. sharon. see mun. boon cian

its time for some champagne popping!!

moved on to venue number 2..our little surprise for ms teh at Zazu, sunway lagoon

the happy girl

finally, a group picture

attack!

mr elwin, thanks for all that beer, wine and chivas *burp*

the girls again

nyehehehe, the 3 of us proceeded to velvet for another round of party >.<

to my dearest darjeeling teh, happy 21st!! from all that years growing up together being teenagers, to now our slow transition from little girls to women, here is to many more years of birthday celebrations with you to come!! =) all the best in life, love ya babes *mwahhhhh*

earlier, it was lily's birthday. (07/07/07)

first time ever birthday dinner was so much like a wedding dinner. wakakaka

taylors people: nikki*kenny*lily*meng sang* kang jie* wengz

nikki.lily.melanie

OMG, we didnt even have a picture together!! =(

lily dearie, we may be so different yet we clicked so well together.!! thanks for always being such a great friend =) may you be blessed with the sweetest in life. happy 21st dear!! love ya muchie *mwahh*

today, i was..

2007-07-27T01:25:00.000+08:00

surprised.
shocked.
stunned.
horrified.
disgusted.

shame on you.

patience is..

2007-07-25T02:46:00.000+08:00

from this..

to this..

after you painstakingly remove those pretty glittery nail polish off all 10 of your fingers.

patience is..when u resist the urge to stranggle me when u check my blog for something more than this post.

=P okayyyyy, i promise pictures of my new (ugly) hairdo and allow you to laugh at it soon ya. wait.

if only i could keep pressing the rewind button

2007-07-16T23:42:00.000+08:00

a quick 10 min catch up session with my sis over the phone just now

sis: gal, my exams tomorrow..so stress =(
me: go bite someone
sis: *nearly fell to the ground* im not you okayY.!!!
me: kekekeke

--------------------------------------
classes start tomorrow.

3 third year subjects + 1 communications elective
1 deferred paper (3rd year paper grrr)
messed up timetable with unallocated activities and clashing classes
friday classes start at 8AM

life ends tomorrow *sobs*

2007-07-11T04:05:00.000+08:00

goodbye my love =(

2007-07-10T04:04:00.000+08:00

but i feel extra emotional today.
sigh.

the MSN messenger tab blinked
surprise, surprise, from someone i havent talked to for ages
funny how last time, it was the most natural thing for that someone to message me whenever i come online. and of course conversation will flow through the night..
but i dono since when, we just grew apart, further and further by the days..
nope, there were no fights, no arguments, no misunderstandings
i tried to make things work again, but oh well, i got tired being the only one who is trying.
and today when i saw the message, i teared and i dono if i should just ignore it or should i reply.

stupid how we sometimes complicate the simplest and most beautiful things.

anyways i replied, and im glad i did. =)

p/s: mel, dashboard confessional is adding to my emo-ness.!! bahhh.!!

clumsy self again..

2007-07-06T01:02:00.000+08:00

today is like a mixture of good and bad..

had lunch with derrick and see mun
derrick.!! hmm a super smart and nice dude we knew all the way back in high school. haha. i kinda lost contact with him so its great meeting up and catching up =)
after that, we went over to digital mall cos see mun wanted to get a wireless router
seriously this is the second time i teman her to shop for digital stuff and boy, i was impressed. this gal knows her stuff.!! so everytime she made me look like some dumb blonde sidekick cos i really donno all these techy computer stuff..!! bahhh!! i look so stupid and helpless yawning away (not on purpose ok =P) when she's talking to the sales person

FIREWIRE.!! bwahahahha (inside joke)

drinks with ingrid after that
hahaha she's my dear shopping comrade..
the other day we spent EIGHT (8) hours shopping around 1U.
haha its freaaaking long okay..
considering that over the recent years i get tired walking around malls just in one or two hours time..getting old edi mahhh..
and 2 hour plus was spent in Zara looking up and down for the dresses we eyed in our sizes -___-" we held onto the size Ms that we tried on while searching for size Ss. YES SIZE S.!! hahahha yeayyy nikki no fatty anymore.!!
oh yeahh sales time could be such a bitch. first there is the crazy crowd. then there are the funny rules in the changing rooms. and no assitance from the salespersons!! goshhh!!
anyways, after careful thoughts and planning, we finally found our dresses during our second visit to the store hours later. WHEEEE =D happy happy happy.
just simply tried in on in front of the mirrors around the store and went to ATM to get cash to pay hahaha. happy happy happy
haha we were in 1U for so long that parking came up to a whooping $7.50!! ooops

and err, when i went home to try that dress properly, i found it to be still too loose.!! GRRR. but seriously after spending all that time in Zara, i would have killed myself if i didnt walk out of the store with it haha.

note to fatty: i wear Zara size XS.!!! hahhaha sorry now u cant call me fatty no more..BUY ME ZARA FROM JAKARTA.!! and KRESPY KREMES.!! REMEMBER!!

woah sidetracked too much, haha back to my day..
then i went to ss2 to collect my phone which was sent to fix
they cant tell me whats the problem with my phone but seems like its working well now
lets hope it stays that way man..
oh yahh.!! everything stored in the phone is gone!! =(
my messages, my pictures (luckily mostly are stored in memory card), and most importantly my calendar!!! =( sobss
and hahha after using mommy's sony ericsson for the past week, i cant seem to use my nokia.!! haha damn stupid. messaging is SOOO difficult.! haha i accidentally cancelled this sms i was typing, twice. no draft saved. then countless times of pressing the # button thinking that its space..and while using the dictionary kept pressing the 'down' button instead of * button..so many typos.!! stress..
but now my whole inbox is empty.!! haha so can always send me mms edi..no need to worry i cant receive anymore haha

last stop of the day -- starbucks @ uptown
gosh havent been there in ages and i didnt know there's a new starbucks outlet in the uptown 37 building
sotong nikki forgets her purse again today.!! left it in the car this morning =P
haha which means that today i spent nothing at all, thanks to all my kind, understanding friends =) hehe..i swear i didnt leave my purse on purpose

and i fell down in the house today -_-"

blue black on my knee cap and it hurts =(

i thought i had my clumsiness under control!!
shit, gotta be more alert, gotta be more careful

okie, time to solve a drama. headache
toodles =)

its 4 in the morning..

2007-07-04T04:26:00.000+08:00

and everyone's off to lala land..
I'm still here.
insomnia sucks.

a friend

2007-07-04T03:05:00.000+08:00

Got this off Daphne Iking's blog..and i thought there is some truth in there

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty,
to provide you with guidance and support,
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring therelationship to an end.S
ometimes they die.
Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real.
But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons,
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson,
love the person and put what you have learned to use in all o ther relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Im hoping for all the wonderful people who has walked into my life for a REASON or a SEASON can stay and move toward becoming LIFELONG friends..but i guess somethings are beyond my control..some people change and some people may not see you as important as they are to you..sighhh..

anyways i really wanna thank everyone that i know, that has been part of my life.. =)

i feel like im on bullet train

2007-07-02T04:16:00.000+08:00

2 weeks had just zoomed by after my last paper.!!

just came home from seremban, celebrated my gong gong's 85th bday. =)
hmmm my family is boring. they talk about religions and enjoy looking at houses for sale. -_-"

i wonder sometimes..
could a religious person be a bad person at the same time??

i hv so many things to do and yet i dont have enough time and money..!! grrr..

my spending has gone outta control (or maybe i didnt feel it before cos i never really bother to keep track).. i just blew almost 550bucks in 7days.!! sounds like alot for me.!! considering mommy has stopped giving me allowance since last month and i havent been working..i shouldnt have spent so much on food..grrr but how could i resist? and the big SALE isnt helping either.!! worst of all mommy's bday is coming, so are lily's, cheryl's, and others..plus im invited to a friend's wedding this weekend.!! OMG i feel so guilty to walk up to any ATM machines anymore.

my eating has gone outta control as well. gosh.!! this is not good. at first i was able to refrain myself from even a single french fries and now im eating like how i always do again..this is not good for my waistline and my health too.!! gosh, i need to discipline myself really before my condition could get any worse.!!

i yearn for a vacation badly.!! sighh..missed out on the bangkok trip..hearing sam talking bout tioman trip (everyone's going to tioman..haha funny trend)..fatty flyin off to jakarta in 2 days time..joez already back in jakarta.. =( i miss vacations..where i can be so carefree

gotta start studying for my case studies for international trade seriously..and decide on the final elective..

havent done my job for our leo concert..shin's gonna get worried if she knows this..!! shit i better start calling up ppl tmr

my face is breaking out..
my phone is sent to fixed..
my purse is empty and yet 1U keeps calling my name.!!
dear God, i pray that i find 100ringgit notes in the back of my pockets. haha

dinner tmr nite with the gals.!! =) michie is back hehe

things u never thought would come in handy

2007-06-24T19:12:00.000+08:00

this blogger draft feature for instance..
haha i was typin this post before the comp crashed =(

First things first, I'm done with my exams.!! mwahahahha. errrmm sort of la. But i definately need a break, the stress was overwhelming.!!

Anyways, its depressing to sit down and think that this is gonna be my last long holiday considering that I will graduate (cross my fingers) at the end of this year and then im gonna join in the rat race and start working. omg, the thought itself scares me *think happy thoughts*

* * *

sometimes i feel like a childish teenager

SO ANGRY.!! had a fight with my parents and now that i think back, i feel damn childish for being so worked up over this whole thing. but thats not the point. can u imagine?? its just so annoying when all u are tryin to do is to be nice to someone else and in return they just take it for granted?? FED UP. lesson learnt. next time im just not gonna ask, i will get what i want. grr

* * *

had dinner at souled out before the 2 doinks took off to bangkok on the next day..

new menu..new items..old staff we thought were new..haha

anyways, the food were not really good that night.!! gasp*

1. sharon's prawn aglio olio..hmm the pasta wasnt al dente.!! its too cooked for my liking. and it somehow tasted different as well

2. my caeser salad (controlling my diet supposedly)..another let down..i miss the croutons in pj hilton.!! =(

3. some snapper thingy..it was ok but nothing to shout about..

4. the mini crab and squid salad..what a rip off.!! the crabs were so tiny like those i used to catch at PD. so pathetic

5. the haagen daazs cake.. =) finally. ice cream can never be THAT bad though this one was quite predictable.

6. the chocolate lava cake..the best thing we had of the night but seriously another rip-off i think.. i could get one with the real warm chocolate sauce filling one at Taste Walking =) for RM9 cheaper.

blackout at souled out.. hahaha

have a fun trip darls, mwahh buy me more souvenirs.!! mwahahhaha

finally steppin outta the house..

2007-06-07T21:49:00.000+08:00

gosh, seriously i havent been seeing the sun for god-know how long.!!
nerding is not fun. blehhh

dono why am i so stressed up over exams this time.
like seriously damn stressed sial. -_-"
and funny thing is everytime i tell someone bout it, they would tell me to punch something.
ppl nowadays are very violent. tsk tsk tsk.
dono why i always have this urge to bite people. HAHAHA. and that is why my sister is very afraid of me.

anyways did my first paper on Organisational Behaviour today
haha stupid me, should have read on the topic on Stress then i would have learnt the proper, technical, proven way to remove stressors.!!

sigh, so in the mean time, i found a new avenue to reduce stress levels..

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

=D have a nice day peeps

im so..

2007-05-31T02:22:00.000+08:00

EXHAUSTED.
omg. mentally especially.
spending days studyin e-biz and finally gone thru the chapters and today ken told me that lecture notes from summer course (which is the one im using) is different from the current ones. OMG. please just put a bullet through my brains.
i just woke up from my 7hrs sleep and suffering from headache. arghh feel like crying

STUNNED/FRUSTRATED/PISSED OFF
my sis got robbed just now when she was jogging.!!
apparently this motorbike with 2 indian fellas passed her by but the moment she saw them making a u-turn coming straight to her she knew that somethings wrong already. she didnt know how to react, so she just stood there, and the guy came down from the bike, grabbed her hands and asked for her handphone. she said at that time words couldnt even come out of her mouth until the man flashed and raised a parang.!! OMG. what the hell. she left the phone at home but she let them have her sony mp3 player. and they rode off, thank god without hurting her.

i dono whether to say shes lucky or shes not. all i know is thank god shes not hurt. damned robbers.!! karma will get to you one day.

what hurts the most..

2007-05-23T01:42:00.000+08:00

i hate it everytime i fight or argue with someone.
so u can imagine how much it sucks for me to fight with TWO person at the same time. ARGH

one of which i tried to talk things out.
i still dont really know what does the last message mean. but i do know that all the messages before that have done enough damage. im sorry i never meant to hurt you. i am also fed up, disappointed and really really hurt. you have no idea. call it foolish but i've chose for you to stay and i will stick with you. i wish you really hear me someday..

another one of which i don even know how to talk to.
by telling you to stop controlling me doesnt mean that i want you outta my life. i just need some freedom, and i still need you. i put down my ego and try to speak to you but all you did was to leave me there standing alone like an idiot. everytime i turn around and walk away, im crushed. i know sometimes i say hurtful things without thinking twice..im sorry..silent treatments are the worst kinda torture..please talk to me..

im sooooo exhausted.
as much as i hate to admit, im a very vulnerable gal.
*cry*
why do we keep hurting each other??

to believe or not..

2007-05-22T01:14:00.000+08:00

in tarot card readings..
hehe i gave it a try with lily n pearlie..
*kan cheong*

so after shuffling the deck, i was told to pick 3 cards while the lady picked another 3 for me.

i didnt look at the first card properly. haha
anyways it supposed to tell me bout my PAST..
all she said was that im from a normal family, not rich whatsoever..
bingo.! i thought to myself. haha then i became more attentive

second card tells you bout the PRESENT
and the card i got was..

The Sun

lady's intepretation:
u yearn for freedom. >.<>

my reaction:
WOW. this is very very much true haha

intepretation from paranormality.com
Not much wrong here!
Definitely one of the most positive cards in the pack, the Sun lights up the situation and brings happiness, enlightenment, vitality, health and fulfillment.
Just look at the picture - it says it better than words can!

the 3rd card tells me bout my FUTURE..and this is what i got

The Fool -_____-"

the moment i saw that card i burst out laughing.! haha
lady's interpretation:
'sha ren you sha fu' in mandarin, which basically means that by being the foolish, naive and sometimes stupid self, i'll be able to be successful in the future.!!

my reaction: OMG, is that dream come true or what?! hahahahahha

intepretation from paranormality.com:
It's the start of something new, a new adventure or journey.
Expect excitement, fun and a sense of adventure
The Fool is usually depicted stepping off the edge of a cliff - a leap of faith into the unknown. But he's also looking upwards, full of optimism and kind of carefree.
There is an element of naïveté, thoughtlessness, immaturity, lack of responsibility, impulsiveness or lawlessness to this card though, so be aware of that.
The Fool says, expect the unexpected, go for it, but sometimes the question to be raised here is whether one should look before you leap

next, i chose to ask bout relationships..and i flipped the 4th card..

The Moon

lady's intepretation:
hmmm u have something that you cant seem to let go in your heart and its holding you back from getting into relationships. there are many ppl around you who likes you but you are simply not giving anyone a chance

my reaction:
hmm. really? got alot of ppl who likes me meh?? how come i dont get asked out on dates?? hahahha..bout the thing that i cant let go..i dont even know myself. maybe its the fear of getting hurt. or maybe insecurities. or maybe the perception that men cant be trusted. or maybe the fear or being control or tied down. or maybe the fear that i myself would change into another person. i dono.

intepretation from paranormality.com:
Another of the cards that can be seen quite negatively, the Moon warns of fears, anxieties, confusion and subterfuge, but can also represent the power of the imagination, unexpected possibilities and illumination of a more subtle kind.
The path may be tough, but it's probably the right one, and it'll work out ok.

then i asked bout my family. and i got the shock of my life when i saw..

The Hanged Man O.O

lady's intepretation:
you dont like to stay home, do you? you dont spend enough time with your family hence the communication problems. and pay attention to your dad's health. something to do with the brains. just make sure u take good care of him

me:
OMG. i nearly died on the spot the moment i saw the card. and worst still when she said my dad might fall sick. =( oh no..got me worried sick. what can i do?? someone pls tell me

paranormality.com:
He usually represents a time of feeling in limbo, being stuck or being prevented from moving forward.
He's usually depicted hanging upside down with his hands tied - that's just what it feels like!
We need to remain flexible and willing to let go of things, it's probably a time for sacrifice.
Like the man in this card from the Murciano Tarot, don't sweat it, take some time out and be patient.

finally the last ques, on my studies..and the card i got was..

The Lovers

lady:
simple. your studies will improve if u get into a relationship. as there is someone there to motivate and stand by you.

me:
HAHAHA. isnt that gonna be a distraction?? errm sigh. guess i gotta continue my struggle in my studies. shit.

paranormality.com:
Everyone loves to get this card as it often points to new love, attraction and sex but it isn't always as it seems. It can indicate failed relationship, unfaithfulness and seperation as well.
Choice is often indicated here, and it's an important one. Quite often it's a struggle between the heart and the head.

hmmm hmm..what can i say?
there were truth and the rest could be pretty general.
to believe or not.? is the question
haha but anyhow i guess there wont be any big changes in my life

i love you, you love me

2007-05-14T01:26:00.000+08:00

knowing that i'll be drowned in the pile of assignments over these few days, i already bought my mom a mothers' day gift last week..mwahahhaha

she didnt really like the bag at first..but after i modelled with it and made her try to carry it around then she started to think it looks pretty good (either that or just to make me feel better)

didnt even have dinner today with my parents (thanks to assignments). but i managed to 'fei che' to rush home. even though it was 5 minutes past 12, i guess my surprise was still worthwhile..hehe

this is me, my mama's daughter, acting cute..

and this is mama, who really layan-ed me..!! hwahahhaha super damn cute.!!

though we quarrel all the time (no doubt i've gotten those hot-tempered genes from you)
you have been one fantastic mom that not everyone is blessed with..
i really appreciate all the things you've sacrificed for me..
thanks for being the person whom i know will never leave me..
and i hope you know that i will never leave you too..
i love you mummy.!!

happy mothers' day.!! mwahhh

while ur going crazy over projects,

2007-05-09T04:29:00.000+08:00

u'd probably be looking something like dat..haha

looking through my pictures, only i realised how few pictures i have taken with you =(
not even one in 2006!!

the last time we saw you..with your new bob with purple highlights..but still with the same old wacky crazy attitude =D

while we've grown so much since form3..
you still are, and always will be one who will remain as my best friend, my sista =)

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY yoi yoi.!!
i miss you soooooo much.!!
kisses and hugs and monkey dance for ya =)

a report on my daily stuff to bore you..

2007-05-09T03:49:00.000+08:00

woke up at 10.30. white coffee to kick start my day

for hours, i donno what did i do when i should have completed some work. my brains must have melted with the heat.! SO hot can die.!!

lunch at 5 with cheryl..haha this is what happens when mummy is not around..bayu timor's food was disappointing but air-conditioning was great.!!

dinner at 8.30 when i was still super bloated over sarawak laksa, kuih talam, carrot cake and iced cappucino

then immediately drinks/study session with ingrid at secret recipe. haha whole day hanging out in taman megah.!! had another cuppa coffee with thick cream. BLEURGH so bloated even 2 cups of eno dont do much help. =(

still awake right now at 4.03am, not because of the caffeine of course, im immune long ago. hahha but caffeine seems to make me talk alot of rubbish. arghhh i should be doing work instead.!! im gonna die someday in between today and next week arghh.. case studies presentation on monday, then organisational behaviour assignment due on wed, and marketing strategy on friday. *faints*

what i need desperately: power of CONCENTRATION and mosquito repellant.

maybe some sleep now first. and wake up in time for some mcds breakfast perhaps.? =)

argh caffeine making my brains hyperactive.

Pussycat Dolls - How Many Times, How Many Lies

2007-05-07T00:07:00.000+08:00

They would try to tell me something
Oh, but I was hearing nothing
When they said you was just playing me
I didn't listen
I didn't want to
You couldn't find a blinder fool
I'm here
Searching through the wreckage
Wondering why the message never got through
And I found
I mis-placed all my faith
How could I put my faith in you?

How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
While I was here believing in you
I got to put the blame on myself

Should've known with everyone else
Just knowing they knew you was just bad news
I should've walked out (I should've walked out)
I should've stayed clear (I should've stayed clear)
I'm glad your sad ass is out of here
I've gone and thrown out all the records
All the ones that ever reminded me of you
I've gone and tore up all the pictures
'Cause there was not one shred of truth

How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
While I was here believing in you

There were so many times
There were so many lies
I don't know why I stayed around
There were so many days
There were so many games
I should've thrown your sad ass out
Only the dumbest fool
Would ever trust in you
I've finally got wise
I opened up my eyes
Your game is over
I've gone and thrown out all the records
All the ones that ever reminded me of you
I've gone and tore up all the pictures
'Cause there was not one shred of truth

How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
While I was here believing in you
How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
While I was here believing in you

I opened up my eyes
OhYeah

last week has been rough..

2007-05-05T04:01:00.000+08:00

on thursday, i was damn pissed off because of somebody (refer to previous emo post)

* * *

then on friday, had a lovely dinner with the gals at Souled Out (again, haha)

human beings can be so realistic

so here goes the story..souled out actually offer jockey parking service for its patrons..i stopped my car in front of the restaurant and before i could wind down the window the jockey signalled a big 'NO' as he walked towards me..and the moment i mentioned im elwin's (the manager) friend, his "NO" turned into a warm welcome.! he then volunteerily opened my car door for me and my my small little kelisa was parked right next to the entrance. omg . what the fish?! tsk tsk tsk..what kinda attitude is that man? pffft.

girls night out are the best.!!

then we had jack joining us for dinner. =) yippee im no longer the lonely lobster.

sadly, the night ended with a bang (pun intended)

i got into a car accident. *CRY*

now i know how can people actually fall asleep driving. -_-" not funny ok.

banged a cab. cab's right back door was dented while my left front bumper, mud guard and door was dented. and because of that dent, my door couldnt open.!! *freak*

really gotta thank everyone who came to my rescue that night.

shit wei, when can i finally stop getting into troubles?? grrr so pissed off at myself.

* * *
woke up unusually early on a saturday morning

after parents left the house, i rushed over to jason's workshop with cheryl

oh no.!! his fren said my car can only be fixed on monday.!! this means that i have to go home and confess to my parents and that means that im gonna die.

depressed, i tried to delay my death by going to the curve with phooi see as planned earlier.

how coincidently harry was at the curve as well. we went to another workshop and i couldnt believe it when the mechanic said he just need 2 hours to get the car fixed, at a price 40bucks cheaper than the first mechanic.!! seriously i couldnt belive it. harry u saved my life.!! haha i didnt believe it until 3 hours later we went to pick up the car.! =D i was so so so glad. i could finally go home with my brand new little kelisa. and the best part is my parents will never have to know what happened earlier. =P

* * *
joyride + mahjong on sunday

aiyoyo, i cant resist it when i hear the word 'mahjong'. hahaha my current addiction. shit, im turning into such a gambler/auntie.

went home. had a huge fight with mama. sigh sigh.

drinks with cheryl and aweng.

finally i collected my job payment from a year ago.!! haha better late than never.

couldnt find my purse and sat there whole night worrying =(

witnessed snatch theft.!! omg. the thief just walked towards the table next to us, grabbed a bag on the chair and hopped onto the bike and the two of them just rode off. it happened so quickly in a flash! OMG. its really not safe anymore anywhere *shivers* damn these stupid robbers.

* * *

monday was fine except for the part where i was starving and suffering before i can finally eat lunch.!!

and Qi Qi is back for 2 days.! haha

* * *

tuesday 1st of may is Labour Day AS WELL AS Wesak Day (and of course holiDay hehe). somebody owes me lunch kekeke.

went to the temple with my family. actually, parents and qi went early in the morning, sat through lotsa chanting and all..haha me and grandpa went later, in fact, we only went for the free vegetarian lunch..wakakakka..religion is a very delicate issue to me, im still very much undecided.

went for the famous duck rice in state. omg. the rice was super damn nice.!! first time ever i actually asked for more rice hahaha. the duck was yummy too, tho it looked abit 'pale' haha. and the best part was that its cheap.!! 2 thumbs up

oh yah, the unlucky thing bout today was that my phone had no reception/signal since i dono when. whole night i tried turning off and on the phone. went to the phone shop. called up hotlink and followed the instructions that didnt work..ARGH. still couldnt work. so fed up. haih my phone is barely 5 month old. *cry*

* * *

wed woke up, first thing i did was to turn on my phone and miraculously there was signal. -_-" phewww..good thing.

after a hearty dim sum breakfast, we sent Qi Qi off at Pudu. =( there she goes again

then, i mahjong-ed for the rest of the day. and still losing money. blehh

* * *

classes as usual on thursday

alot of catching up and updates online..haha how rare to have so many people online at the same time.. =)

and hey you, i dono what are you tryin to do or prove by saying those things to me. please spare me from anymore confusion and lies and bullshit

I still don't have the reason

And you don't have the time

And it really makes me wonder

If I ever gave a fcuk about you

Give me something to believe in

Cause I don't believe in you

Anymore, Anymore

I wonder if it even makes a difference to try

So this is goodbye

" Makes me wonder" by Maroon 5

hahaa cant believe i couldnt recognise adam lavine's voice.!! this song is super damn catchy and it was stuck to my brains for days..finally now i know who sang it..yeayy =)

* * *

friday started off with lectures from mom again

bugged and sweet talked the receptionist dude to let me fax some letters. haha. true enough, we gotta persevere and that way we might be able to convince others. a little charm helps too.!! ahhaha

lunch with baby

mama chop papa grill sucks.!! eeeks
cheryl came by to pass us her tulips, haha dont ask.

and tulips look much nicer in pictures.!! haha have been deceived by the pics.

went shopping at 1U

i lurve ALDO. their bags are relatively cheap =D

love balenciaga too, but the rm1179 price tag brought me back to ground. haha

i wish i could go shopping everyday with a limitless credit card. hahaha =)

i declare myself officially broke now. sigh.

shall bury myself with assignment and presentation and maybe some revision =) wish me luck. and dont tempt me. haha. motivate me instead ok

have a nice weekend ahead ya all =)

stuck in my head..

2007-05-03T19:04:00.000+08:00

When you go
Would you have the guts to say
"I don't love you
Like I loved you
Yesterday"

"I dont love you" by My Chemical Romance

you answered it yourself..

2007-04-29T01:51:00.000+08:00

when you asked me why dont i trust you and believe whatever you tell me..

so many times i told you..already i have a general mistrust with people..plus you always tell me things which are too sweet or too good to be true..i knew it..i should have known better..

i really dont know how can other people handle your attitude problems.. *salute* but it really amazed me how you tried to change all that and tried to be so nice and sweet to me..to a point that i actually thought that you were tolerable. to a point where i actually thought you are a good person and actually quite nice to hang out with. omg. i cant believe myself.

it was just the other night when you gave me sweet promises again. and it was just a few days after that night you've gotten a new girlfriend.!! the gerberas have yet to dry up yet. hah. so ironic.

i know..i was the one who told you to give up so many times.. i was the one who pushed you away..and we didnt even dated haha..but do you know when you gave me those promises and tried to fulfil them, i was trying to believe and putting in trust to you at the same time??

i just felt like a total idiot when all these times i was busy convincing myself to sail away from the safe harbour..questioning myself if i was being too harsh to you and being too mean to you and maybe i should see what you've done for me..never did i thought that you were whispering sweet words into another girl's ears at the same time..oh god i dont even wanna imagine if you've used the same lines you used on me. you bastard.! in a way i actually wanna thank her because she stopped me before i could fall into that trap of yours. but when i see her i just feel like telling her what you've said to me, cause i bet she didnt know either.

its funny how you can just delete everything you've said to me from your brains..pretending like nothing has happened..and how you can look at me and say i accuse you for lying to me..and how you eagerly show her off in front of me..and now worse still, how you are tryin to push me towards him. i can feel it ok..im not a toy alright.!!

it was freaky when you once said 'i want to feed you, groom you, take care of you, show you whats love all about and then when you are so into me i just kill you, isnt that fun?'

oh well.. you didnt really get to do any of those, except for the part where you kill me. knowing you, i know you didnt feel as though you have done anything wrong. but yeah, congratulations, you did succeeded at betraying my trust and hurting me. JERK.

this is getting old..

2007-04-26T00:48:00.000+08:00

but really, assignments are killing me.

ARGHHHHHH!!!

fucking hell. i've been feeling damn shitty for the whole of today. *cry*

now i just pray hard that i can stay awake and concentrate on finishin up my assignment

dear lord, please please please let tomorrow be a better day..

sigh

2007-04-19T01:17:00.000+08:00

bumped into win sizn and jessie while i was having dinner with lifu just now.
first thing that came outta win sizn's mouth was 'WAH why are you so dark?'
=( is it really THAT bad?? *still in denial*
i look healthy right? with a nice hawaiian glow? no?? grrrrr

tanned gals VS fair gals?
whats your pick?

because of boo bar..

2007-04-16T01:52:00.000+08:00

i fell in love with this pink flower that i was playing with at boo bar..
after some help from google, i found out they are called GERBERAS.!! =)

gerberas.!! so bright and colourful..!! =) so lovely..!!

wow, this bouquet is different and so refreshing =)

all red gerberas.. so simple yet so classy

OMG. these pink ones are too die for. sweetness overdose

mixture of gerberas and lilies..sweet

pink + purple.. every gal's fave colour combination when they were 5

actually, lilies are really elegant and sweet as well. haha

and of course, speaking of flowers how can i forget roses.?

my fav roses are pink-tipped white roses. =)

but still, who could resist these velvet red ones?

hahaha i cant help it but i think im turnin into a 'fa chi' (translation: flower maniac)

B for

2007-04-15T01:58:00.000+08:00

BOO BAR.!!
mwahaha last sunday was the grand opening of Boo Bar
CONGRATULATIONS to Mr Boo and Mini Boss =)

funky green layout. young and fun ambience. cheap and nice food. and high possibilities of seeing us hanging out there..do come and check out Boo Bar at Cineleisure (near elianto) =)

hahaha what a great night. finally a gathering with the gang which i havent seen for 3 months.!! siao chu the drunk. jason the hiao poh. ah sin the cook. simon the senior citizen. the women clan. hahaha

on a more personal note, i ate non-stop for 2 hours. haha i really need to curb this monstrous appetite man.!! its crazy.!!

haha all pics stolen from cheryl's blog.
i like the last pic. the pink flower i was holding was damn schweeeet =)

me tryin to look macho while siao chu didnt even have to try but looked pretty. awww.

the amount of beer consumed that night. =P
haha alcohol makes the world goes round
i havent been laughing this hard before for a long while.!! my god hahhaha

gosh. drove home. and papa knew that i drank and drove. FISHCAKE.

easter reminds me of....

2007-04-14T11:19:00.000+08:00

BUNNIES.!!! =) i lurve bunnies..absolutely the cutest and most lovable creatures..

this lil fella with the *caught red handed* look. haha this bunny looks like a fren of mine

i like grey bunny =) its so small it should fit snugly in your PALM

* * * *
yeah so as i told u easter break started of with me slaving myself..waking up at 6am..i was stationed at zone A the entrance, supposedly the best gals r stationed there..BUT i was burning myself under the hot hot sun all the way till 4+ no kidding!! plus we have to be agressive to push sales. repeating the same lines over and over again. layan-ing weird/ham sap people. lunches were picnic under the trees and under curious stares from tourists. sigh. the worst thing was my ugly tan lines really.

while ppl in station B worked under the shade. and lotsa ppl approaching them to buy the headphones straight from them as we already promoted to them at the entrance earlier on

and some ppl in i-dono-which station at the grandstand..got to WATCH THE RACE. bahh.!! plus there were only very few of them there so they could easily secure alot of sales without having to kill each other off like we did.

then we were talkin to this gal working for sauber bmw. under the shade. wearing more cloth than us. without any height requirements. and her job was just to give out flyers. getting 250 per day.!

pfffft. we all really felt like idiots man

worst thing was the bus broke down on the first day. and on sunday, it ran outta petrol on the way back. -_-" seriously, how can the driver be so stupid to let this happen.?! gosh this has been the most tiring job by far. i just wanted to go home =(

* * *

monday night dinner with the sistas =) i like, hehe
yummy food paired with white wine..i like even more, haha

baby.darling.manja.naughty.
mwahhhs

* * *
visited boo bar at cineleisure to pass baby my homebaked brownies. hahha hope u didnt laugh at the ugly looking piece of thing.

when boo bar was still under construction. pic stolen from sharons blog
haha this lil green shop sure standed out..i would hv missed it if it wasnt for the bright green interior

then went to william's house to mahjong. harry guided me for a few rounds then i started winning.!! mwahahhaha. omg, see mun u havent been teaching me the real skills no wonder i always used to lose to u gals.!!! grrrrrrrr. hahahha now i know how to play edi..mwahahhaha first time i went home with winnings (not much but still..) from mahjong.!! wheeee

* * *

watched the hannibal rising.
errrm oh well, there were the grusome bits
but the pace of the movie was pretty slow, whole movie was over 2 hrs
i liked the twist to the story line
but somehow felt disappointed
so, i give it a 6/10

* * *
visited see mun at work on friday..haha i think we've been hangin out so often lately my clumsiness spreaded over to affect her as well..haha part of the reason i went was to return her purse she left in my bag.

cheryl and i had our tai tai style afternoon tea at 1U =)
then we went shopping. unplanned. my god. haha we walked from old wing to new wing then back to old wing then new wing..so many times i lost count.! not bad eh? haha all in search for a perfect 3-inches gold heels. thank god she got her heels..and i got my new purse finally.!! =)

* * *
okie, gotta go change to go have lunch with my see mun dear. OH GOSH im getting sick of 1Utama

char siew is back.!

2007-04-08T00:00:00.000+08:00

lemme tell u a secret..
i hv this weird habit of predicting the luck of my day with the first few things that happen to me on the day itself. hahaha
so today as i was tying my shoelaces..i broke my left thumb nail.!! OUCH
i was predicting that the day will be damn shitty...until..
i stumbled across a nicely folded 100ringgit from my sling bag zip compartment.
MWAHAHAHHAHA damn happy =)

today is the beginning of my one week easter break.!! wheeeeeeeee
but i woke up at 5am for work ..what a good way to kick start the holidays -_-"
working during the F1..not as an umbrella gal mind u..just selling official merchandices..quite disappointed cos i thought finally i can check out the race tracks but sadly im stationed at the entrance.. blehhh.!! not even a glimpse of anything inside man =(
im DAMN FAT.!! arghhhhhh. someone suck the fats outta me please.sigh
it was a LOOOOOOONG and HOTTTT day. i freaking burnt myself under the sun today. while typing this, my whole shoulder/arm actually hurt soooooo badly. =( pain.! *cry*. my tanlines on the back r especially obvious, and not to mention ugly. arghhhhhh my perfect suntan didnt turn out quite as well..=(
haihhh. today my sales was not too good compared to the other gals. tomorrow gotta go out there and sell as much as possible man.!! *semangat*

time to sleep now..see you ppl tomorrow at sepang.!! remember to buy headphones from me..and please, dont look at my tummy.!! >.<

what a day.!!

2007-03-31T23:55:00.000+08:00

woke up at 4AM today.!! bet u all going o.O hahaha
broke my personal record man. the only times i wake up at 4 are either to rush assignments or to revise before exams.

anyways im working for a tvc as a stand-in. so basically, im positioned at the set so that the producers and directors can set up the lightings, furnitures, props, adjust distances and angles, colour coordinate the set etc.. it was a loooooooooooooong and tiring day. work ended at 7.30 pm man. but i learnt alot and woah, never did i know shooting is such a meticulous job and the amount of precision and details taken into consideration is just madness.!! such a big crew is involved and many 'interesting' personalities were present. definately an eye opener.!

im facing a stubborn situation right now. sigh. forced to come face-to-face to it. as much as i cant take this situation anymore, i think i will have to give it some time before i can stand out to settle this problem. argh.

headache worsens when mom yelled at me over the phone =(
work requires me to get up at 5.30am tmr.
dr. micheal yap hasnt replied me regarding my presentation.
OB assignment is due on thursday.
arrghhh. i desperately need to sleep. toodles.

aiyoyo!!

2007-03-30T02:11:00.000+08:00

imagine when ur ordering your favourite drink at coffee bean
and when ur whipping out ur purse to pay...u realised its not there.!!
PANIC.!!

that was what happened to me today. =(
after suffering for hours not knowing whether i lost my purse forever or i might have dropped it at home..

then...
i found my purse under my pillow!! =)
dont ask me why is it there. i hv no idea too. but THANK GOD.!! =) and thanks to cheryl n see mun who crossed fingers for me haha.

* * *
aries cooked us some french soup which looks very chinese herbal soup =) ahhhhh i feel so loved. hahahha

now all i have left is to finalise my table of contents and the assignment will be done.!! =) wheeeee

i know how deep have i fallen..

2007-03-29T02:27:00.001+08:00

for coffee.!!
when its 2am in the morning
and there's a cockroach lurking JUST under the microwave oven

instead of screamming, i actually inched closer and reduced the physical proximity between me and the cockroach, just so that i can heat up water for coffee. at 2am.

ahh, the things i'd do for coffee. unbelievable.

=(

2007-03-25T16:11:00.000+08:00

im screwed up.
BYE BYE social life.

sotong doing what she does best..

2007-03-19T23:07:00.000+08:00

so few days after that super blur day..

i was spending the day cutting out words from styrofoam for some leo thingy. then as mommy was hurrying me to go out for lunch, i desperately wanted to finish up the letter "F" first. dono why when im in a rush, the styrofoam cutter seemed to be not working. so i pulled harder, and tada, i broke the wire/ heat element. *pengsan*

after lunch, my dad said he'll fix it for me. who knows when he replaced the broken wire with a super good heat conductor - copper wire, it didnt work. then he ignored it and went to sleep. -_-" while i tried another wire and it didnt work as well. =(

argghh i just wanna quickly finish it up but i cant. so i lied down on the floor with the styrofoam, stared at the ceiling and looked completely mindless. strangely, mommy was being so caring and asked me whether or not its fixed.

then i decided to go out n buy some wire on my own, and out of the blue, papa was being damn nice as well and offered to take me. =) so i got a new cutter (wire not sold on its own sigh) and happily went home to finish up the work.

then who knows the cutter didnt work too, because the battery sudah takda energy. ARGHH! but again, papa was being super damn nice (i got worried) and went out to buy batteries for me. hehe sweet.

so i was cutting out more foams, and suddenly needed to look at this piece of paper on the table. lazy me just pulled and tada, i knocked the coffee cup over, spilling nescafe all over the place. the cup was half full. GREAT

haha, i think you all should be real bored reading all bout my clumsiness. hopefully, there wont be a part 3 anytime soon.

sotong nikki strikes again.!

2007-03-15T00:57:00.000+08:00

today, i rushed outta the house at 11.45am for my 12pm class.

while waitin for a parking spot, i realised that i left my phone, my lecture notes, the book i need to photocopy at home. great. so i thought nevermind, no big deal. then i casually checked my timetable and guess what?? my class was supposed to start at 2 today, not 12.!! -_-". good job, nikki lee.

so i went home to collect all the things i forgot and headed back to sunway. i was supposed to drop by the post office to post something wayyy overdue, then i missed the turn. great.

sometimes, im really amazed by my clumsiness and forgetfulness.

* * *
to compensate for the lack of photos, im posting this set of uber cute pics..get ready..

i especially adore the baby hitler and baby shrek haha =)

have a nice day dearies

whats next?

2007-03-14T00:19:00.000+08:00

my laptop cant infra red now. blehh.
hence, no pictures to show,
therefore no mood to blog
its always more interesting to tell a story with pictures.

anyways, someone take me out please.!! haha desperate call for help before i start growin spider webs

its a jinx

2007-03-09T11:55:00.000+08:00

somehow, i feel like im very often jinxed.

on tues, i finally learnt how to open my car hood.

was driving my mom around town. my aircon wasnt functioning (for days edi) so it was so hot n stuffy. i got heat rashes.!! anyways at a point, my mom noticed that my engine temp has risen up to H, the highest level.!! *shock*

so we pulled over at hilton and called my dad. lalala got instructions from him. we gotta wait 30min for the engine to cool down first. so it was 30 min of me n mom getting a sun tan, as though we are not tanned enough already.

just as i was pouring water into the tank, a lady approached us and offered help. WOAH so macho. she was checking my car, pouring water for me, started my engine, making sure everything should be fine before i go to the mechanic. such a nice person, thanks marriane =)

next stop was of course, the mechanic's at paramount. apparently my aircon motor was spoilt and must be replaced. called wengz to come to my rescue so that i wont have to wait there for 2 hours. haha. 2 hours of korek-ing info and gossiping with the chi mui haha.

now, my aircon is running so well i got a flu

i feel so stupid

2007-03-03T01:09:00.000+08:00

because after contemplating and thinking over some issues for 2 days, and finally coming to a decision..thinking finally, everything's settled..

then all it took to ruin it was a firm 'NO' from my dad.

great. all the time and braincells wasted in the process of decision making. worst still, im gonna miss out on a smashing birthday party, meetup with a buncha long-lost friends and a shopping trip down to singapore.!!! i was planning to go to bugis junction already. bahh.

mom always complains that instead of asking for her permission, i usually just inform her on my decisions. and now tell me why would i wanna ask when there is a 50% probability that my proposal could be rejected. grrr.

i hate being controlled. haha very true of me being a sagittarius.

arghhhhhhh. im still very angry at my dad. pffft.

this aint a city, its a golf cart ass face..

2007-03-02T01:25:00.000+08:00

fishcake. i still couldnt link Blogger to Youtube.

anyways if you've heard of fall out boys' (i LURVE them by the way) 'this aint a scene, its a god damn arms race', go and check this misheard version out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LucfKdukf10

SUPER DAMN FUNNY.!!
hahahha i laughed so hard

i forgot that...

2007-03-01T19:24:00.000+08:00

there are ppl who keep tab with whats happening in my life through this blog. like lily. hahaha ppl i sayang but i dont get to see very often. ok lar i shall update especially for you then..highlights only k, cant be telling you everything that happened..i dont wanna bore u, too much.

WARNING: super damn looooooooong post ahead

..9th feb..

was a weird day

i woke up coughing, really bad

but oh well, its the team bintang reunion, so die die also must go lar

it was my first time playing twister *shy shy shy* haha. but that game gave our muscles hell. not to mention that every second i was worried that my shorts will terbuka or kena ripped apart.

the initial plan for the night was to finish up the absolute rasberri and chivas from bali, but there were half bottle of each, four of us, one (lifu) down with flu and one (me) down with cough+flu. in order to survive tommorow, i chosed abstinence from alcohol. it was more diffucult than i thought considering that i have such wonderful friends who dont give up tryin to coax me into drinking -_-"

i had a sip. thats it.

if you look carefully, me and chian are nicely fitted into the pic =)

* * *

since we couldnt finish those alco, we decided to give them to yihaur as farewell gifts. *proud* so next stop was yihaur's place, which was DAMN BLOODY far away from civilisation. bahh kena conned. everyone was drunk already, great. im not complaining though, it was fun to watch drunk ppl hahahha =P

..10th feb was a day filled with bday celebrations..

after dragging ourselves outta bed, mel and me rushed for hong yin's bday lunch at itallianies. my cough and flu didnt cure on their own but instead, i felt worse. 1000X worse. hahaha so sorry hongz i was so quiet and moody and sick looking.

happy birthday hong yin!! mwahhhhh

and i still owe you a gift. haha i figured i shall take my time to find you something that you'll definately like rather than rushing out to grab some meaningless gift. so lang jeng teet ok? hehe

* * *

dinner was at shook, starhill for michie's early 21st =)

lovely place. it was much bigger than i thought. menu was as thick as a book. hahha. food was not bad. again, because i was so sick, i was stoning most of the time. =( aikss.

me and leen.

thanks dear for the lovely dinner. happy 21st birthday to u again, michelle sweetie. mwahhh

* * *

was feeling damn sick for the whole night. so when i got home, mommy teman-ed me to get some medicine from 7-11.

i know, the blue one damn dodgy looking right?? haha but it worked for me!

and those orange ones, haha cy sorry i took it home with me after bali

..11th and 12th of feb..

was spent at home, a patient needs her rest

..13th of feb was a looong day..

cheryl and i havent seen each other for ages.. =( so we decided to meet up. we dont have time for drinks cos she has to send her bro back to school. so i went on a joy ride with them. hhahahhaha and we chatted all the way, to and fro, then back to where i parked my car and we continued chatting. and the thing was, both of us actually had cough. haha darling, you're officially my car chatting kaki man =D

* * *
and also, today is michie's actual 21st bday! mwahh mwahh mwahh stay sweet and pretty always. may our friendship blosoms into something greater and may it lasts. =)

..14th of feb..

is valentines day.

sigh. dont DONT remind me of my 21 years of no proper date on a valentines day, depressing man. but thank god, i have my darling with me =) haha. i have my darling with me through all the times, mwahhh

last year, i spent valentines day working at 1Utama. bad thing was that i had to watch lovey dovey couples for an entire day. but my job was to promote something and at the same time, give out FERRERO ROCHER, which means i get to EAT them myself.! mwahahhahha. i loved that job for the chocolates i get. i think i've eaten over 100 ferrero rocher during the job =) after work, my fren uncle kam (not an uncle, but a nickname lar) took me and cheryl out for supper. that was it.

* * *

this year, my valentines day started off with my mom asking me to drive her somewhere, at which i replied 'but its valentines day.!!' so she said 'but what difference it makes to u?' damn it. my own mother also dont think i can secure a date. -_-"

i tried. it didnt work. haha

* * *

well, i didnt have a date, but i went out with dan, wengz and wai king. first we watched daniel shopping (as usual). then, we had a very lomantic lunch at..... KFC. -_-" cos the boys said that KFC in aus sucks. followed by the movie 'blood and chocolate' =) hehe i've always wanted to watch this movie so no complaints. then after the other 2 left, dan and i had a drink at coffee bean, nice.

* * *
rushed home to bath then its my date with my darling cheryl. and lucy and evelyn. later joined with min fei and gang. haha. alallalala i didnt get any flowers.! and after an hour only the stupid waitress serve me my drink. i was dying of thirst. and the food never came. this is a restaurant with very very bad service.

* * *

nevertheless, i received this card. old school snail mail. sweet.! =) love ya loads too my baby

..15th of feb..
i was very nice to teman my darling for a photoshoot. ngek ngek ngek. by now you all should be thinking all glamorous, whole team of makeup artist, profesional photograher, tonnes of hair spray, fancy clothes and all..

YOU'RE WRONG.!!

im talking bout passport photo shoot. wakakkakakakkakaka. it was damn funny lar. but i shall spare my darling from embarassment.

* * *

then it was partying with mel, wengz, dan, lifu, abby, pohleng, eugene, nichola, pei lin and the rest at maison...its abit different this time becos it might be the last time im seeing mel before she goes baack to aus =( and clubbing with nichola =) anyways it was a goood night for me as i successfully conned alot of drinks, nyehehhehe. it was an even better night for lifu though, hahhaahha naughty naughty.

..16th of feb..

woke up receiving a message from mel telling me how much she loves me. haha definately put a big smile on my face for the rest of the day. glad u like the present dear. i risked my life making it. no kidding. i cut myself with a rusty blade. but ok lar, im still very much alive today =)

* * *

cny shopping with my mom at tesco again

WAHH. i havent seen such BIG onions in my life before!!

* * *
Qi Qi was back from johor =)

* * *

drinks with nichola at mv cos that gal's sense of direction is 100X worse than mine. tsk tsk tsk.

hhaha, this reminds me. yesterday night in maison i saw this funny/weird guy. i was walking nonchalantly outta the toilet then i saw him. he was dancing alone, shuffling i think, plus his hands in the air and all in the middle of the way. damn ah beng. i was kinda stunned. and it was written all over my face. i had that eyeballs pop out look. hahaha then he stopped immediately and let me pass. hahahaha damn funny.

again, i forgot to pass her the badge i got for her from bali. ARGH my forgetfulness. piak*

..17th to 20th of feb..

Chinese New Year.!

first was prayers at home. well since im a free thinker i just do whatever my parents tell me to do lar.

then we went down uncle kit's house in seremban as usual. no no, not my hometown, im from JB remember?? just that his house can accomodate all of us =)

every year, the first thing that i look for in his kitchen..LA MANILLA FRUIT CAKE.!! my love =) mwahahha. i hate fruit cake. except for this one. its so niceeeeee

for our family, chinese new year means eat, eat, eat, sleep, debate over religion issues, play boring games to layan the kids, watch tv, watch dvds, play fireworks, and eat more. we watched casino royale, kung fu hustle, deja vu, da vincci code, and some other boring films that i didnt wanna watch.

so this year we decided to do things abit differently.

we started off the first day..going to church. hahaha. the pastor was quite good actually. i really donno why i was dozing off *shy*

then we went jogging in the evening. yes. jogging.

me and my sis. we walked. haha

my sis's shoe. obviously its a sign. we shouldnt go jogging on cny. we should act like normal ppl and just pig out at home.

see yihaur, i miss u alot too.!! =) u must come online ok..i havent talked to u since u went over to melbourne. =( *sobs* or u better email me or soemthing haha. i dont care. how's ur leg? haha hope its fine already. aihh, miss u so much lar, butterfly. haha

..20th of feb..

reached home at 11.30pm then off i went for the last yum cha session with melly martini, sigh. turned out to be a session where everyone grills lifu. hahahha poor thing. but i think i grilled him the most. bwahahhaha.

next, we wanted to play mythbusters. heard of the coke+mentos=explosion myth?? all we got was a teeny weeny splash. hmmm. perhaps its because we didnt use diet coke? or maybe because the mentos fell onto the grown, and hence may spoil the result?? i donno. u tell me mel after u experiment it again ya.

thanks dear for the present. love it.!! =) haha first time ever i received a bday present almost one year in advance. now that doesnt mean that you can be absent on my actual 21st okay. must come back.

since your going away, chai chai's custody belongs me to now. mwahahahaha. this damn cute fella suffers from identity crisis. it stays in MY silver kelisa now. haha. melly, i think i shall save u from another im-gonna-miss-u-so-much speech. this long distance thing is HARD. =( must. email. me. at. least. once. in. a. week. ok. [this is not a question, its an order]

..21st feb..

finally met up with lily dearie and we visited hong yin one last time before she leaves =(

this is princess. so damn cute.!! i fell in love with it. hahah but not everyone can tolerate her hyperactiveness. i dont mind at all. damn damn damn cute.

"oh its a gal.!!" thats the first thing that came to wengz mind. typical guy.

=) hongz, we didnt get to spend much time with u during this summer break. sigh this is what happens la when someone got attached. haha, anywys we still love u and we're gonna miss u terribly. have faith in yourself ok. i always have faith in you =)

one day, im gonna kidnap her.

* * *
another family dinner.
this time around at home. prepared my the wonderful chef of the house, papa lee. =)

yummy yummy yummy.

..22nd feb..

breakfast with nichola at coffee bean. oh no. their hot chocolate really sucks. yuck. i should have just stick to the ultimate.

as we yak yak yak, and still cant get enough of it, i decided to joined in her lunch date. mwahahhaha. at OUR place, manhattan fish market =) hehe.

* * *

bumped into my darling.!! hahahah damn dramatic man we all.

* * *

rushed to subang to see leen before she leaves to melbourne again. sigh. i hate to say goodbyes.

* * *

yet another family gathering at nilai

again, aunty kay wanted to do something different, so we had char kuey teow, where we actually charred our own kuey teow. haha

then its the chinese salad...yee sang.!!! i likeeee =)

we had baileys =) i love bailey. slurpp*

..24th feb..
drove qi qi back to school. i drove all the way down man =) *beams* oh gosh the moment we reached i felt so so sleepy all of a sudden. but i couldnt sleep so i drove back up to nilai. haha. the rain was CRAZY i tell u. it was so heavy at one point i couldnt see the lines on the road and the sky was very dark already. then this idiotic car next to me cut into my lane and splashed water all over my windscreen. for 5 seconds [which felt like an eternity] me n my mom were holding our breaths cos we cant see anything at all in front. omg. damn scary. thank god nothing bad happened. phew.

..25th feb..

hoi toi at meng sang's place. mahjong, chor tai tee, poker.
after hours of playing, i was back to square one.

* * *

went to melissa's open house. got lost for half an hour trying to locate her house. it was a huge huge mansion and when i arrived, her dad was playing the guitar and singing. haha so cool.

check out the amount of bottles of alco there mel n hongz.!! haha

short and fat vs tall and skinny

see im not exactly a very sociable person. i almost died in a whole house of strangers waiting for ezzlynn to come. haha oh no my fatness is showing

..26th feb..

finally, get to meet the gals. blackjack session at sharon's. her bro played 100bucks a hand. omg. i can feel his pressure man. hahah. at the end of the day, still me no win no lose. oh well, its better than losing money like last year i guess.

..28th feb..

back to uni. DAMN IT. cant believe this close to 4months holiday had came to an end. bye bye social life, bye bye college mates, bye bye sleepovers, bye bye no curfew nights. oh man, im going back to the stressful life filled with assignments, homework, presentations, classes, and more pimples. =(

good thing was that kenny was in both my lectures today.!! yippee =) and bumped into han jin in the later lecture. woo great. at least now im not alone =) next mission is to find a study partner to push me to study and do work.

* * *

finally, im done updating. it took me hours man. bleurgh. and i realised alot of ppl still owe me pictures.! melanie ho, sharon, michie, lily..i want the pics.!!!

all the way from germany...

2007-02-08T13:03:00.000+08:00

meet my friend, takashi san..

takashi san loves to change his hairstyle and of course, hair colour
he got skinnier and skinnier everytime i see him, while i grow fatter grr
takashi san wears a sweater under the malaysian sun and said its not hot
but takashi san doesnt like death note.!! O.O how can?!

haha anyways his not takashi lar. his chinese chinese. =D
my oldest friend hehe, choon wei
who also happens to be the heartless friend who never ever remember my birthday, until last year. actually he cheated, he didnt remember it, he checked through friendster.
2 years ago, before he left, he told me
"gal, i'll get you an LV purse yeah, very cheap in Paris"
then today he present me with this.. (exactly 2 months belated bday gift)

seeeeeee. i knew you wouldnt have kept your promise.!
hahaha but er, i didnt expect anything at all cause you always forget.!!
thanks boy =P

im being left behind..

2007-02-07T03:32:00.000+08:00

final meet up with huiling dear before she leaves to melbourne tomorrow=(

seems like i'll be starting my new semester all lonely again.

anyways dear, im really glad to have known you. im seriously gonna miss studying in centrepoint with you.

hope that you will be having fun over there and do take good care of yourself. *hugs*

another farewell thingy with teen..
we went to the Eye of Malaysia

its 15bucks per person for 4 rounds and to be honest, it wasnt anything great or spectacular.

it felt like ferris wheels at genting highlands, only faster.

because it wasnt very high,
i could only see the few famous skyscrappers
like the twin towers and the nearby istana budaya.

in fact, i think 90% of the time inside the gondola was spent of taking pictures and thinking of ways to capture a nice and clear picture from where we were. -_-"

before i knew, it was our turn to get off. hahahhaha

what a disappointment.!! but oh well, at least now i've
been on the eye of malaysia =P

why do you need 8 cup holders for a 5-seater (car)?

2007-02-06T02:52:00.000+08:00

i woke up early just to make it for gals' day out

BUT, my good friend hy cant make it

and worst still my other good friend melanie ho jia ling cancelled on me on the morning itself.!!!

fishcake!

sigh. since i already told my mom im going out for lunch so might as well just do so lar.

so i had lunch with my baby. haha once in a blue moon eh?? since i always have to eat with my mommy.

oh no..my darlings are planning a trip without me.!! *cry cry cry*

went on to the curve and ikano to shop around.

i saw so many nice dresses!! but why am i always so broke? damn it.!

i just bought a 40bucks top and i had to consider and reconsider and take a walk and checked out other shops and went back and comtemplate again before i finally made the purchase. bahh.

this sucks.

then it was dinner at souled out with yihaur, mel and daniel.

it was some sorta farewell for yihaur. =(

can u believe there was actually a cockroach (and i believe many more) roaming around the ground at souled out.!! scary shit.

went to somo for drinks.

so this time yihaur made a reservation cos the last time we wanted to go to somo but there were no more tables *bummers* it was under 'chew'.

so we reached and settled down and started to fall in love with the nice rattan chairs then the waitress asked 'so you're waiting for your other friends to arrive?'

so we were all blur cos yihaur made a reservation for 4.

apparently we were sitting at the table, for 30, which was reserved (coincidently) under another 'chew' hahahhaha

and the funniest thing was that later when the other chew and gang arrived, one of them was actually yihaur's friend.!! hahaha

somo was pretty cosy and nice but it was pretty weird they dont have cocktails on the menu. how caaaan?? i want my margarita..

errm. this lousy shot was the only pic of somo. of the whole night in fact. because the owner of the camera doesnt know how to make use of it. aikssssss.

we raced to daniel's house with 17 bathrooms.

'big fish small fish' is officially my favourite game at the moment. wakakakka.

and unbelievably, i just ate one piece of my fav chicken mcnuggets. =P

ooops. seemed like danny boy got it real bad that night.

take care ok dude.

p/s: mel, na mo o mi to fo~ wahahhaha

it aint easy..

2007-02-05T01:53:00.000+08:00

a funeral, i mean.

so yeah i was back from alor setar on last sunday night.
hmmm just so you wonder how i spent a whole week there..im here to tell

arrived on the tuesday morning. after some sleep, we changed into white tops and black pants and headed to this siamese temple where my ah ma's body is kept. looking through the opening of the coffin, it was the first time i saw my ah ma's tiny, motionless face. its erm. a rather emotional moment lar. after that, we just spent a whole day sitting at the funeral parlour. the sun was soooo hot and there was nothing to do at all. gosh. so i just ate and slept and ate more. then a quick shower at my aunt's place and we're back sitting at the funeral parlour. it was passed midnight before we could finally balik and tidur.

wednesday and thursday were repeatitions of tuesday. except that we had hired 3 monks from china (damn expensive, they charge rm4400 man) to come and chant and pray for my grandma. 3 one-hour sessions every night. hmmm so i was thinking, luckily im a freethinker. imagine if im a christian. how would i be able to chant and pray for my grandma then.?

oh yeah, i also realised that my chinese writings are getting really bad. not just because my handwriting resembled that of a 7 year old, i just forgot how to write so many words.! its so embarassing because i was the 'treasurer' who was supposed to write down those people who came to give 'pek kim/pak kam' sigh.

and also, ironically, this was the time where all the aunts and uncles and cousins were present together in alor setar.

so back to ah ma. friday was the actual funeral day. this had got to be the worst part throughout the whole process. i've avoided looking into the coffin for all these while (emo ok?) but it came to the time when we all were allowed one last glance at ah ma. after that, all of us had to kneel down in front of the coffin and lower down our heads while they seal the coffin, with hammer and nails. i tell u, that was the scariest and most heartbreaking sound ever. after some prayers, we all proceeded to the crematorium. final prayers and ah ma's coffin was pushed into the incinerator and we were told to leave. bye bye ah ma.

but but, the story didnt end here. oh my god. seriously this is the first time i've attended a funeral and never have i thought it would be so troublesome and so tedious. we headed back to ah ma's flat where they were gonna set up the altar and so we did some more prayers. and the thing was that there must be a giant joss-stick lighted continuously for 49 days.! it was damn stressful when the first joss-stick sudah habis and we havent bought any new ones so we had to cheat and used the usual tiny slim joss-stick temporarily. damn stressful.

everyone was damn exhausted and relieved when its all done. phew!

oh ya so suddenly i think to myself, since im a freethinker, how would my body be handled next time when i die eh?? shit. gotta find a religion soon haha. sigh. actually i guess next time when i die, i wanna be cremated. (cos its damn gross to have worms and insects and god know whats as my neighbours if my body is burried. eeeks!!) then ermm no need whatsoever prayers and chants lar..as long as my loved ones come and whisper some last words to me. then erm, my ashes will be sprinkled into the sea and then thats the end of my story. oh yah, and pardon me for being selfish but i really do hope i die before all my loved ones. i dont think i can handle the lost of someone i love dearly very well. and haha i bet alot of you know that i just wanna live up to like 60 years old (think The Lotus Eater) im not afraid of death itself, just as long as i dont have to suffer pain and illness or anything like that.

it may be a good thing afterall

2007-01-29T12:56:00.000+08:00

the first thing mommy told me this morning (yes, today i woke up in the morning) was that taiwanese actress, xu wei lun, passed away in a car accident.
O.O
she was so pretty and so talented and she was only 28.

then mommy told me my grandma aka ah ma was in a coma
so she has to go back and i have to stay put to take care of the rest of the family
next thing i know..
mommy told me that ah ma has passed away around 11am
i was stunned
tears stung my eyes but i didnt cry
i was never really close to ah ma, i guess its the language barrier or the fact that she mumbles
but i'll remember how ah ma always favours me over my sis, haha
and how ah ma always tells us to do this and do that
and how ah ma's cookings always turn out sooooo good
although we never really get to spend alot of time together
i've always admired her for being such a strong woman
single handedly raised 5 kids throughout the years
suffered from diabetics and arthritis
i guess it is time ah ma gets some rest

17.12

2007-01-29T00:20:00.000+08:00

was the time shown when I sheepishly grabbed the alarm clock.
haha. very funny.
I laughed myself off and checked my phone instead. 5.12PM.
OH MY GOD.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - -- - -- - - -- - - -- - - --
anyways went to check out hong lip's cafe yesterday
hmmm. it really didnt look like a cafe be it from the outside or inside
haha. but the drinks were nice and the prices are reasonable.
seems like we found ourselves a new hangout =)

after that, im on my way to nichola's place
found my way to bandar puchong 2 (which was very deep in puchong) *beams*
seems like my sense of direction has improved since the bali trip. haha.

look what she got me from the states..

GODIVA vanilla hazelnut coffee =)
ohh my..it smells SOOOO good.
alrighty, im off to learn the proper way to brew coffee. hehe

intoxicated.

2007-01-26T17:40:00.000+08:00

a treat by the birthday boy =)
vietnam kitchen's food delicious as always *drools*

moving on to round 2 at souled out (again)
while waiting for everyone to arrive..

seems like the kelabu myvi is quite spacious.!!

.
.

what is a birthday without a birthday gift..
a GRAVEYARD specially for danny boy, from melly and yours truly =D

mission accomplished!! *evil laughters*
.

moving on to check out dan's new house

PHWOAR.! it has freaking SEVENTEEN bathrooms.!! O.O

chilling in his room and errm..my shameless friends did some shameless thing which are too shameful to be shared. hahhaha

this was 3 years ago *GASP*

and this is now.

happy 21st again to you danny boy =)

as requested by michie..

2007-01-25T18:56:00.000+08:00

Miss sharon tan poh lin has officially turned 21 =)

The birthday gal hosted a bash at souled out (where else?) on the 25th.

Party was 7.30pm onwards but guests (cheryl, bc, joe, leen & me) waited an hour before the host arrived. -_-" char dou

it was a huge party with more than 30 of us.. the chicas, the family and the senior citizens. haha

super cute backdrop. we blocked the name 'sharon' haha

all the chi muis who were there.

see mun. cheryl. leen. boon cian. sharon. nikki

my baby and me. mwahhh

it was time.!! 21 teeny weeny candles on a lovely tiramisu cake. hehe

i think the theme of the night should be changed from 'beautiful' to 'colourful'

cherkki the Christmas Tree

the three of us. sorry if our dresses give you an eye sore

lastly, we were entertained by the birthday gal. there she was doing the 'dancing queen' and 'para para sakura' . =D

may all goes well for you in this coming year, sharon baby.

finally you turned 21.

now you can proudly march into poppy, flashing your ID at the dog-faced bouncer at the entrance.

=) lotsa love and hugs for ya

just when u think i stopped blogging..

2007-01-25T16:48:00.000+08:00

PHWOAR.
i havent been updating for a long time
and its so mafan just to log into blogspot
grrrrr

anyways 2007 has started off with a blast =)
hahaha. im sooooooooo sorry. gotta go out now
i promise real updates with alot ALOT of pics soon =)

*mwahs

to a new beginning

2007-01-04T12:58:00.000+08:00

2006 has came and gone..
im not too sure how much have i truly achieved through out this year
of the 7 vodka shots to the 7 new year's resolutions
i could vaguely rmb only 3 outta them -_-"

in 2006..

i got alot closer to me college mates..
Then there were the kajang sleepovers, parties at luna bar n zouk, dim sum at jalan ipoh, dinner at taste walking, vodka drinkin, and of course, the langkawi trip..mwahahahha

made some incredible new frens..
like nichola my conjoined twin in uni, who saved me from my miserable uni life from uni n taught me alot of things from boy-scouting to o2jam
and kenneth, my tues bak kut teh/ ju yok fan lunch partner, who always sympathize my pathetic social life n poke fun of my fatness

still hanging onto my dearest sisterhood..
although half of the sisterhood were miles away from us
although some of us got so busy with our own lifes
we still managed to make time for gatherings at souled out..bday dinners..yumcha sessions at friendster cafe..partying..hanging out together..chattin in the car..haha

took a few short trips..
langkawi (what happened in langkawi stays in langkawi haha)
singapore..2 diff trips with diff ppl but basically did the same things..haha shopping..eating (MOS burger.!!)..clubbing

also, I met someone
he was the one who moved and opened up my heart (amazing for my long-standing singlehood status)
but sadly, he was the same one who didn’t catch me when I fall
it was difficult to finally stop hoping that he will call, to cry my last tears for him and to stop my heart from skipping a beat when I hear his name

and there was this dear fren of mine..
its a looong story how we got to know each other 7 years ago
from acquaintences to frens to best buds
then uni mates and finally classmates this year
it upsets me that now we r back to where we first started off

its pretty much the same my relationship with my parents
one day we could be laughing together
the next day we could be arguing over some silly issues
sigh, i guess this cycle will never end

there were several pretty uneventful incidents too in 2006..
lost my phone
then got into a rather frightening car accident
then again, lost another phone (worst still, its pig's) and got into a stupid accident both on the unluckiest day of 2006

Whether I like it or not, many things have taken place and alot have changed
I laughed, I cried,
and many times i dono whether to laugh or to cry
I have been upset, angry, confused and depressed
I've gotten drunk, gotten a red eye and gotten fatter
Along the way, I've learnt alot about myself, people around me and things in general
2006 wasnt my favourite year through out my 20 years of life
so..im definately lookin forward to a better year ahead and hopefully a better me.!!
may 2007 be a meaningful year filled with joy, laughters and good times for everyone =)

much love,
nikki

HOHOHO

2006-12-25T18:48:00.000+08:00

m e r r y
c h r i s t m a s .!!!

christmas always has this special magical touch to it
hehehe

may you be surrounded by your loved ones
may you be stuffed by all the good food n wine
may you be tired of unwrapping gifts
may you be enjoying peace, joy and love always

muacks muacks
much love, nikki =)

lap lap kai fan over and over again

2006-12-24T18:17:00.000+08:00

first trip to melacca on 2nd dec with the family =)
bad start, i fell sick n puked. eeks
thank god that uncle kit got me some anti-pucking pills
and a whole afternoon of sleep at..

the bungalow at a famosa

every bungalow has a private pool
thats is my sis fishing dried leaves from the pool

i recovered.!! hahaha
actually i just wanna show u i look slim in this pic =P

thank god i got better
wouldnt wanna miss international buffet for my dinner

me n sis walkin around aimlessly

told u im macho.

do u like our pink hair?

me the witch.
zam zam alakazham

they said i looked like papa's galfren haha

day2
after bfast n checking out
we went down to melacca town

lap lap kai fan.!!! (chicken rice balls)
i've never tried it before *Shy*
now u see it...

now u dont.!!
hahah its so yummy.!!

continued walking along jonker street

stopped by to buy some jagung-like thing (??)

cendol!! my savior on a hot sunny day =)

baba laksa, only available in melacca yo

asam laksa, melaccan style
tasted different from those u get here
but it was goood =) i likee

fried taufoo
note: all these food were consumed within 2 hrs, mwahahhaha

before we returned to the car
thats it, my melaccan trip
cant possibly fit in more food on that day already haha.

------------------------------------------------------------
10 days later, on the 12th
i made another trip down to melacca
haha. this time around with teen, joezer n edwin =)
damn shy, edwin the indon knows melacca better than us malaysian

first things first, chicken rice balls.!!

errm. dont look appetising rite??
n yeah, it tasted errm, tasteless.
arghhh should hv went to the other shop =(

this trip has been very tourist-sy =P

we went to the museums

looks like a tomb, doesnt it??
its actually the drainage system back in those days

no no, these are not fishballs
they are BULLETS wakakakka, interesting

with the dutch man.
that freaking huge book is real!!

ice kacang machine wakakakak

look what i found..penyu weng yew.!! =D

a view from above

woah..the arch looks damn ancient rite?
its fake.!! made outta cardboard n stuff ahah

this pair of shoes on display looks like the one im wearing

then we came to st. paul's church

heavy stuff i tell u

other side of the church

love this picture. haha the only proper pic of all of us

bahh after spending the whole hot HOT afternoon visiting musuems n tombs
we popped by pahlawan mall (or something like dat)
AIR CON.!!! =D
edwin n joe got new t shirts to replace the smelly ones they r wearing
n i got ice cream haha

went over to jonker street for cendol
same old place =)

we wanted to hv ikan bakar for dinner
but it was only like 3 something
so we went over to mahkota parade
plans to watch 'cinta' tak jadi..bad timing
ended up at the arcade n watch the guys shopping blehh

hit the road again
our mission: ikan bakar
edwin said he had it at kampung duyung
i cant rmb where i had it the last time i went to melacca with nichola
so we asked around ..
and got lost for like 2 freaking hours.!!
these ppl arr..very helpful but aiyoyo dont simply give us wrong directions lar -_-"
pengsan.
at last i called darren n he told me to try the portugese settlement
haha it was a rough journey too

but YESS.!! finally we're here =D
damn scary. the moment we stepped outta the car there r ppl recommending us waht to order already.

in just a matters of minutes, the sky turned dark

teen, the very angry n tired driver

edwin, the very hiao playboy bunny

joe, the retarded lookin camwhore

IKAN BAKAR finally.
its only so-so but yeah dont really care anymore sicne we're so hungry

lalala. i took over the wheels
and we started hunting for satay celup
aiks again, i cant rmb where were the streets eric brought me to..like 10 satay celup shops on each row man.

we got lazy after rounding the same area
so simply settled for this shop
eeeks. not really nice lookin satay celup
40cents for one fishball. ripoff man.!!

we took photos at EVERY single red traffic light, EVERY
hahaha. aiks all pics with joe

bad influence

i look errr..in here
but look at joe..macam perempuan saje..hahahah

aikks..no more traffic lights as we hit the highway =(
karaoke-ing all the way down

finally back in pj, phew..
wanted to check out the ice bar but er..its not even up yet, chehh

chillout at laundry at last, soooooooo exhausted

finally, an exhilarating ride home
hahha sorry lar, i hv to drive fast cos it was late edi =)

all my bags are packed..

2006-12-13T20:40:00.000+08:00

im off to ipoh, then penang, then alor setar to visit my ah ma (and to eat, of course =) )
will be back on next thursday yeah
till then, take care dearies
xoXoxO